12/8/2023 0 Comments Devil daggers cheaterBut to your friend who is reading on your behalf: the best traditional option here is exorcism. And, if you’re actually physically possessed by the devil, you’re probably busy with explosive bodily fluids and aren’t the one reading this. Religious authority figures love to take on demons and have a pretty good track record, though not so good as to ruin the tales they tell. Thanks to the movie The Exorcist and its ilk, this one is probably the first you thought of yourself. Really, if you’re the devil’s daughter and your girlfriend gets all tangled up with your dad, you should probably step in if you can. We women have to help one another out, and if your BFF has a pesky devil problem, you might hold the answer, especially if you happen to be the devil’s daughter. But let me implore the women reading this to not dismiss it out of hand. I do apologize for that, as, historically, it is mostly used by men. This option at first sounds like it’s only available to men. This continues, and the tale takes some convoluted twists, but at every turn the patient, quick, and cunning daughter outsmarts her dad and saves Jack, and the whole story ends with them married and living happily ever after, both of them safe from the devil at last, thanks to her cunning. The holey bucket, of course, does the job in three pulls and Jack is safe another night. The youngest daughter admonishes him for not heeding her advice and switches buckets with him. But he didn’t, and every scoop of water just brought more water up until water poured out the top of the well. The devil’s youngest daughter had taken a shine to ol’ Jack, and she came to him the night before and told him that whatever he did, he should choose the holey bucket. Jack was given the choice of two buckets-one regular bucket, and one with holes in. The first task was to empty a well to find a gold ring lost in it years ago. There’s a tale from Southern Appalachia about a man named Jack (okay, there are LOTS of tales from that part of the world about a man named Jack, and this is one of them) who got in a situation where every morning he woke up at the devil’s house and was given some impossible task to complete by nightfall, lest he be killed, his soul given over to the devil, and his head displayed on a stick (just to rub in the failure like they did back then, I guess). So when I say you might consider enlisting a woman to help you with the devil because her cunning is almost as legendary as his, I’m speaking from a time when the only power women had was their ability to manipulate a bad situation as best they could to their advantage. Now, I don’t mean to be sexist, but you have to understand that stories about the devil date back hundreds of years, and history is kind of a sexist place. Pick the one that fits your situation, and, above all, just try to keep your cool, ok? As I see it, you have about five ways to save yourself. And if he’s just there being a dick, no contract involved, you’re probably feeling pretty hopeless. Sure, the most obvious option is to take the standard contract, but as many of us have learned the hard way, the standard contract isn’t usually the best deal you can get. How does an otherwise upstanding soul like yourself keep, well, your soul, in a situation like that?ĭepending on your circumstances, your options may not be as narrow as you first assume. Or maybe he’s just there to torment you for the fun of it and you can’t seem to get him to go away. Maybe he’s shown up, uninvited, tempting you with your heart’s desire-the return of affection from one you adore, or riches, or fame, or instant weight-loss, or a get-out-of-jail-free card-and, even though you know better, even though his offer sounds too good to be true, it’s also too good to ignore.
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